Sunday, November 4, 2012

KAMB: Kobolds Ate My Blog?

I consider myself an open-minded individual. as such, my tastes are as diverse as the weather. some things call to me to try out, while other i give a fair shake, but choose to put aside. i'm serious at times, and other times i'm goofy and carefree. it all depends on what kind of mood i'm in.

several years ago, at my local game store, i came across Kobolds Ate My Baby. having heard of it, but never played it, i was curious. seeing that there was a new super deluxe edition on the shelves and in a pretty good hardcover edition. i decided to pick it up.

after reading the 30 page book cover to cover, my gaming life has never been the same.

KAMB! is perhaps one of the best games that i have ever played just for fun. its hilarious and strangely therapeutic. the situations are both strange and engaging. lunacy and chaos always seem to prevail in these games, but in the end you're left with a smile on your face a mile wide.

so, what's the deal?

you start off playing as a kobold. not the DND lizard type, but a small, furry, dog-faced gremlin with a taste for babies and a penchant for mayhem. sounds scary, but their inherent lack of intelligence and self preservation tends to tip the scales to the advantage of baby survival. these poor, furry, dumb creatures don't know any better, and often they end up dying in some horrific way during the course of the game.

so why play?

well, for one, after reading the book you know exactly what you're in for in the first place. nobody really likes these little buggers; not their king (ALL HAIL KING TORG!), their patron god Vor, chickens, people, and their own species. the kobolds are on their own in this one, and will often fight with each other to complete their tasks. it makes for an interesting dynamic.

two, when forced to rely only on yourself, and you have the cumulative intelligence of a pet rock, you tend to become very inventive with the items you have on hand. a slightly broken 10 foot pole might not seem very useful to you and i, but to a kobold it's perfect for knocking the geriatric nanny unconscious and tying up the kiddies to carry them back "shish kabob style".

so, is it always about eating babies?

no...and yes. kobolds are eating machines, and will try to eat anything in sight, especially each other. the best way to describe them are as rabid wolves that are very very dumb and very very small. their voracious eaters, but really don't know what's edible. sometimes, they can cheat death with their dumb luck. other times, the luck runs out and they have to roll on the "Kobold Horrible Death Chart". Usually this results in a random implosion, explosion, a meeting with Vor, a meeting with Chuck Norris, picked apart by chickens, explosive flatulence, and any other numerous horrible way to die that the Mayor (the referee) can come up with.

so, should i play this game?

why are you still here? GO PLAY IT!

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